Category: | Review - Internet | Publish date: | 1/1/2010 |
Source: | Mark Prindle Record Reviews (United States) | ||
Synopsis: |
8 / 10
While taking Henry The Dog on "A Walk" the other day, it suddenly struck me how often over the years I've taken special care to appreciate having him around, since dogs have relatively short lifespans. It never occurred to me to appreciate my wife in such a manner, because I took for granted that she'd always be here. Now she's gone, she's not coming back, and death has nothing to do with it. She simply fell out of love with me. After fifteen fucking years.
I haven't experienced this kind of emotional pain in over a decade, and this degree of emotional pain ever. My adult life was cruising along so well for so long, and now I'm suddenly lost, hopeless and alone in my own "New Dark Ages." I realize "We're Only Gonna Die" at the end anyway, but I don't know how long I can stand to "Suffer" like this. "Won't Somebody" please convince my "Dearly Beloved" that she's made a terrible mistake? Sweet "American Jesus," it hurts to be rejected by the one person you loved and trusted more than anyone else on the planet. "Fuck Armageddon, This Is Hell."
Maybe "Tomorrow" will be better. Maybe I'll suddenly wake up and feel like a "Man With A Mission." But so far, I'm just wandering around sad and scared -- sad because my soulmate doesn't want me anymore, and scared that I will be alone for the rest of my life. This hurts to an unbelievable, indescribable degree. Nearly every good memory I have from the past decade and a half involves this woman. Six weeks ago, everything seemed fine. Today, we're preparing to sign separation papers. My childish "Resist Stance" certainly hasn't done me any favors (particularly when I tried to commit "Social Suicide" two weeks ago), but this ripping apart of our marital vows is all too sudden for me to comprehend. It's as if alien "Germs of Perfection" have taken over her mind and turned her against the last 15 years of her life. It feels like my heart is California and "Los Angeles Is Burning."
All I can do now is mourn my loss and try to develop a new life. I definitely need to meet new people; I hardly know anybody in NYC. My cognitive therapist recommended that I attend a meeting of Codependents Anonymous, but their web site has all this religious crap on it so I'm not sure I could find any "Atheist Peace" there. Might as well join the "Flat Earth Society"!
This live album doesn't have any songs on it.
If it did, "Won't Somebody" would be a slow boring generic song previously available in acoustic form as a bonus track on New Maps Of Hell, and "Resist Stance" would be a brand new ass-kicker with an opening riff reminiscent of an early Rush song. But again, it doesn't have any songs on it.
Best,
"Marked" Prindle
- Mark Prindle