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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote coop Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Topic: #metoo
    Posted: 03/07/2020 at 03:11
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote notciv Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 02/29/2020 at 10:58
Originally posted by Robo Pilgrim Robo Pilgrim wrote:


Originally posted by notciv notciv wrote:

 

Fear is all about security right? To fear being harassed once is, in a relative sense, no big thing. To fear being harassed twice is a virtual nightmare. 

Saying it's no big thing is just normalising it when no one should ever have to experience it.

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To fear being accused of harassment once is a pretty big thing I bet, especially if it is the type of man to touch women without respecting intimacy or some safely assumed personal boundaries. 

If he does that then it's not a false accusation.

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What I'm trying to conclude here is that a man accused twice of harassment will change his behaviour in a positive manner, predictably by being careful where one gets physical with another.


If he's been accused twice then chances are he's also done it several other times and I doubt he would change his behaviour quite so easily. He'll just target someone who's less likely to speak out or at the very worst threaten them into not speaking out. 



Interesting male perspective. Thanks.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Robo Pilgrim Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 02/29/2020 at 09:56
Originally posted by notciv notciv wrote:

 

Fear is all about security right? To fear being harassed once is, in a relative sense, no big thing. To fear being harassed twice is a virtual nightmare. 

Saying it's no big thing is just normalising it when no one should ever have to experience it.

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To fear being accused of harassment once is a pretty big thing I bet, especially if it is the type of man to touch women without respecting intimacy or some safely assumed personal boundaries. 

If he does that then it's not a false accusation.

Quote
What I'm trying to conclude here is that a man accused twice of harassment will change his behaviour in a positive manner, predictably by being careful where one gets physical with another.

If he's been accused twice then chances are he's also done it several other times and I doubt he would change his behaviour quite so easily. He'll just target someone who's less likely to speak out or at the very worst threaten them into not speaking out. 

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote notciv Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 02/29/2020 at 00:55
Originally posted by Robo Pilgrim Robo Pilgrim wrote:

Since we’re talking about things that can’t really be compared, how about the fear of being falsely accused of harassing someone and the fear of actually being harassed.


Fear is all about security right? To fear being harassed once is, in a relative sense, no big thing. To fear being harassed twice is a virtual nightmare. To fear being accused of harassment once is a pretty big thing I bet, especially if it is the type of man to touch women without respecting intimacy or some safely assumed personal boundaries. What I'm trying to conclude here is that a man accused twice of harassment will change his behaviour in a positive manner, predictably by being careful where one gets physical with another.

In Canadian courts, the prosecution is called Crown and must prove the guilty mind as well as intent to commit the crime, in a duality nature where one does not go without the other. Let's talk about guilt. The guilt of being a victim has some intense psychology to it. "What did I do to deserve this?" I can only suppose that the guilt of being falsely accused has some serious psychology to it too. "What type of man am I or do I look like?"

Edited by notciv - 02/29/2020 at 03:40
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Robo Pilgrim Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 02/28/2020 at 11:31
Since we’re talking about things that can’t really be compared, how about the fear of being falsely accused of harassing someone and the fear of actually being harassed.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Banjo Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 02/28/2020 at 05:42
Yeah, not as many careers are being ruined as people are suggesting. Louis CK is still doing standup.

I have sympathy for anyone wrongly-accused but it has nothing to do with real victims.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Robo Pilgrim Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 02/27/2020 at 14:41
David Letterman got his own Netflix show after admitting to numerous affairs. He's fine. 
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Joe Dawson Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 02/27/2020 at 14:07
Banjo, homicide and stealing something is something different.
You can't compare it to the molesting.
I'm a guy and the sh**t stick to me like a glu.
it doesn't matter that the accusation was false. In 2030 people from the neighborhood
will say : "That's the guy who was molesting a women!
Now look at the David Letterman. He's kinda down. He's big time career is over.
He maybe gonna get to the peak again, but the stick sh**t never fall off.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Banjo Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 02/27/2020 at 08:03
I'm just fed up of the "some people misreport it" rhetoric. It's irrelevant. If someone is behaving in bad faith then it's a separate issue. Some people falsely accuse others of murder or theft. Does that mean we should stop trying to investigate and prosecute these things?

I feel sorry for those who are falsely accused but it's a separate issue and is a garbage reason against #MeToo.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Alice Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 02/27/2020 at 03:54
I agree, it's all gone a bit mad. There's some really serious shit happening out there that's getting lost in all the complaining about very minor things.
The current code of conduct at my work place says it's harassment if it's "repeated and unwelcome". Note that that's anything- either verbal or physical harassment.
Once can be an oopsie (depending on severity), twice is questionable, but more than that is a problem.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote notciv Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 02/24/2020 at 18:11
I like the discussion here and it doesn't matter your opinion because you're entitled to it, and the discussion is good.

I didn't #metoo when it was cool and that was on purpose.

I graduated high school over 25 years ago. Touching the small of a lady's back in Canada is intimate.

The more people report sexual assault, the more files there are that compile actual criminals who actually assault women. In Canada, the statistics are mind-boggling as to the guilty verdicts on sexual assault cases against women, the number of reports, etc...

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Robo Pilgrim Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 02/24/2020 at 17:17
Go on take a swig of that poison and like it
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Joe Dawson Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 02/24/2020 at 14:42
Now i'm 37. And i ... i don't want to hurt anyone, all right !
I can talk about my personal experience so i will tell about the polish womens.
i had couple bad situations with polish womens.
Like the ladys at the job who was saying bad things to me and i couldn't do anything. 
Polish womens can be like Alexis from Dynasty.
They're lie and manipulate to take revenge on the guy.

For the record - i would never ever molesting  any woman ! ! !
And #metoo at the start was something really , really good. 
But now there are couple of womens who's just lieing using the action
to take revenge on ex - boyfriend, ex - husband or the colleague.
That's why #metoo stopped being something cool.

People just overdo with #metoo.

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Leeps Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 02/24/2020 at 13:46
She should be able to speak about it, but why would she? It was HER BACK. I personally wouldn’t find it noteworthy, but that’s me.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Banjo Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 02/24/2020 at 13:26
Originally posted by Leeps Leeps wrote:

If you think it’s harassment to have your back touched, then that’s a difference between you and me.


It wasn't just touching her. He told her that if she spoke about it then it would be his suicide. That's not normal behaviour. That's abuse and harassment.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Leeps Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 02/24/2020 at 11:50
If you think it’s harassment to have your back touched, then that’s a difference between you and me.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Banjo Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 02/24/2020 at 11:48
"Victims should stop reporting harassment because if they do it'll just put me off supporting victims" is a poor take and awful narrative. I hadn't heard anything about that guy until you mentioned him and going by his history of sexual assault he seems like a real piece of work. #MeToo is long overdue.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Leeps Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 02/24/2020 at 10:10
Ok, well that’s what I’m talking about. I don’t give a shit if someone touches my back unless they keep doing it after I say to stop. It might be a generation difference, I don’t know. I am Dave’s age. I just don’t see this as a reason to be investigated. I feel like the whole thing has gone too far and frankly it turns me off of the movement. That’s my opinion.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Banjo Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 02/24/2020 at 10:05
Originally posted by Leeps Leeps wrote:

I’m sure. Touching her back is why he was put on leave and ‘investigated”.


I don't want anyone touching the small of my back. It wasn't an accident. It's creepy and not ok, especially when it's someone who was not long ago fired for sexual assault. He's getting no plausible deniability from me.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Leeps Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 02/24/2020 at 09:56
I’m sure. Touching her back is why he was put on leave and ‘investigated”.
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